Monday, March 11, 2019

Going back to The Glen

The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review
Photos by Kirsty McLachlan | Our stay with Gleneagles was very kindly complimentary but they did pay me £1b to say nice thin...I jest, all glowing opinions on Gleneagles are, of course, my own

Hey pals! Today's post is all about a stay at one of my favourite Scottish escapes... no, not the Irn Bru factory, The Gleneagles Hotel! I visited early last year (you can have a read of the post here if you missed it) and it really is one of the loveliest hotels I've ever been to, so it's always a pleasure to go back. This time we were there for a Galentine's overnight stay so, without further ado, here's what we got up to.

The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review
Figleaves grey cashmere robe (so comfy it hurts)

We arrived around midday and headed straight over to The Dormy, a restaurant I'd yet to eat at. As I've mentioned a few times before - cough, seven hundred - I've got a good few food allergies and thankfully the staff couldn't have been more lovely about it; they gave my aggressively large list to the chef, who in turn made me up my own ristotto from scratch (something I can't normally have) and also emailed the list ahead to all of the other restaurants in the hotel so that a) they could prepare some dishes in advance and b) so that I didn't have to feel like a wally whapping out the list at every meal. If you're someone who suffers from allergies yourself you'll know how rare/welcoming this is! After filling up on delicious risotto and pizza alike, we headed back to the room and good golly was it beautiful. It was different to the one we stayed in last time and this time round had two separate bedrooms within the one 'room' - each with their own free standing bath, I should add - which would be very handy if you were there as a group of friends or with parents etc and wanted both your own space and a communal area to hang out in... Or if you were there as a couple and have a tendency to starfish (/would like to schedule in a post-dinner fall out). After admiring the room we headed over for a golf lesson which, initially, I was a bit unsure of. Every time I've seen golf on tv it's made me want to fall into a deep, eternal slumber - sorry, Dad - but I genuinely absolutely loved the lesson! We were taught by the lovely Steve which I think made all the difference as he was so attentive and didn't do even the slightest of giggles when I missed the first three shots (you know when you're trying to sing along to a song and the singer rudely changes the words last minute to the ones you know in your heart of heart are correct? Same thing with a golf ball; you line it up perfectly, swing the club and suddenly it's not in the same spot at all and all you connect with is air. It's one big conspiracy...). As I'm sure you know, Gleneagles and golf are synonymous so it's nice to say I've finally done some there and in snakeskin cowboy boots no less, which could be a first for the grounds. Just as a sidenote, you don't actually have to be staying at the hotel to use the putting green so, if you live nearby and the notion hits you on a Sunday morning then you're more than welcome to head along.

 After that we headed over for an equally strenuous activity... the pedicure. We visited Bob & Cloche on our last stay at the hotel and it was just and welcoming and homely this time! We had a wee tea and a coffee (respectively, we're not mad) and settled in to get some disco toes awwwn.

The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review
The rest of our afternoon was spent having a wee massage in the spa - Gleneagles has one of my favourite spas I've ever been to, and that's not only because they offer complimentary flapjacks and yoghurt raisins - unwinding a little after a hard day of putting and pedicuring. That was, until I choose to have a deep tissue massage. It was so, SO good but good GOD does it hurt; it felt like there was about two decades worth of tissue being broken down. Kirsty, on the other hand, opted for a firm, but still very relaxing, massage... I'd absolutely recommend both depending on what you're after but just be sure to note that one will leave you writhing around like you're under the cruciatus curse. Make sure you leave enough time to check out the saunas, vitality pool and relaxation time either before or after your treatment! Again, not just for the yogurt raisins but... they don't hurt.

 The rest of the evening was spent having some cocktails (not strictly advisable after a spa afternoon but Galentine's Law says you must have cocktails so you see our predicament) and some food at Birnham Brasserie. By the time we got there they'd made me up and printed off my own special allergen-free menu which was so considerate it almost made me well up. That could also have been due to the alcohol or the fact I'd been recently pulverised, it's hard to say. Very, very satisfied we toddled off to bed. 
The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review The Little Magpie Gleneagles Hotel Review
The next morning, however, Grandma Amy woke up and had to roll out of bed because it was too sore to actually lift my own head up*. That deep tissue massage had well and truly done it's job. We were supposed to go off road driving - which I'm honestly so, so sad to have missed - but we had to cancel this time round because I had a vision of Kirsty driving, me stiff as a board beside her, and the other hotel guests thinking there was a Weekend at Bernie's situation going on. So instead we ordered breakfast to the room, got our robes on and watched a really bad (but incredibly good) romcom in bed. Which actually worked out in our favour because we hadn't had the chance to enjoy the room much up until that point!

*This is perfectly normal post deep tissue massage, especially for someone who's on a laptop all day and has gargoyle posture, so nobody panic.
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And how else to wrap up another beautiful stay than with afternoon tea. One of life's greatest extravagant pleasures. I think the joy of Gleneagles is that what they offer is so varied that there's no specific group of people its geared towards. You see families, groups of friends, people on honeymoon, couples... it's one of those special places that moulds around you and what you want from your trip. It really does have a special place in my little Scottish heart; from the people who work there to the decor to the activities they offer to the beautiful food... if it's one than's on your to-visit list then definitely keep it firmly on there!


The Little Magpie Mulberry SS19 Glencoe Scotland